Throughout the last two months I have done more looking within myself than I’ve probably ever done my entire life. When I was forced to lie in bed day after day I’d find that while my body was shut down I couldn’t slow down my mind. Some days the depression would get the best of me and I’d allow myself to give in to the negative thoughts of hopelessness and anger. Other days I’d find myself overwhelmed with nostalgia – thinking about my childhood and the old days of my family. Many of those thoughts surrounded around holidays spent at grandparents and days filled with family and traditions. Unfortunately, those days have long since passed as my grandparents grew older, family dynamics changed and even inner fighting and being unforgiving got the better of us.
Then there were days where I was focused on the future. I have to admit, I already have days where I start having minor freak outs of how am I going to do everything I do AND have TWO KIDS! Already trying to make decisions about childcare, work hours, client changes and employee training. Trying like so many mothers out there to decide what “balance” will make me personally the most happy. Attempting to decide how much to work vs. how much to be a stay at home mom. Frankly, I’m one of those people that is happier the busier I am. But I also enjoy having the time that I had with Luke to plan loads of play dates, crafting and more.
I have several friends who already have two or more children and they each blow me away. They have all made the adjustment to being a mother of multiples with grace and love. I enjoy just watching them as their hearts multiplied in size and they gradually eased into the juggle that their new life is. Seriously, they are just an amazement and I hope to be as wonderful of a mom to two as they are!
I’m thinking I’ll probably have lots to learn and have to make loads of adjustments as I go! Having children is truly an unknown adventure. Constantly hoping and praying you are making the right decisions.
This is another outfit that I photographed back in September for fall. This is definitely one of my favorite outfits. The sultry, dark floral prints were really in this fall! I wish I could have shown it to you sooner! Candace really killed it with these photos!
Shop This Post: (the skirt is still available but, unfortunately, the blouse isn’t.)
Photography Provided By:
This is my sTORI being written as you read. – Love, Tori